Saturday, August 01, 2009

New Month, New Decisions

Well, here we are at a new month. And I've made a new decision. It has been on my mind for quite some time now, actually. I've tossed it around, gone back and forth, changed my mind and, finally, settled on what I want - what I need - to do. It is with a heart full of gratitude and appreciation that I have decided to step down as a Fashionista (i.e. a Design Team member for Scrap In Style TV). Sigh. This was something that I wanted sooooo badly. And when the opportunity came up about 8 or 9 months after I'd become quite active in the SIStv community, well, I held my breath, prayed and hoped that I would be chosen for the team. And I was! Wonder of wonders I was! And it has absolutely been everything that I'd hoped and dreamed it would be. I found it artistically challenging and fulfilling for sure. It was so fun to give other members (SISters) of the website a thrill by choosing a favorite layout each week. I so enjoyed being in the position to be an encouragement to others, maybe even a mentor of sorts. But the absolute best part has been getting to know Jeanette (the owner of the site) and the other Fashionistas. I expected that this would happen, but I never realized what an absolute blessing it would be to me. These women are amazing - every one of them. And they accepted me (being a slight bit - ahem - older - than them) and befriended me and made me feel so welcome. We've laughed together, cried together and have totally gotten silly together. We've worked hard together, have had virtual parties and actual slumber parties, have eaten together and have scrapped and taught side by side. It's been an amazing and wonderful year. So what the heck am I doing stepping down?

It's all about time. For me, time is EVERYthing. And I think the older I get, (even though I don't necessarily feel older) I feel my time on this earth slipping away. And as much as I love these women and this web site I have just had to ask myself if I really want to be spending so MUCH time on the computer. Being a Fashionista has meant spending hours and hours on the computer each week. I needed to look at layouts and leave comments in addition to being a presence on the message boards. In order for me to do my job to the best of my abilities - which I was whole-heartedly committed to doing - this simply required putting in time on the computer. In addition, I was working with the collections and occasionally preparing tutorials and contributing in an assortment of other ways. This all takes time. I think I realized how much time when for a couple of months, we didn't get a collection to design for and all of a sudden I actually had time to work on some projects of my own with some of the extensive stash of product I've collected over the years.

Not only that, but I just have felt this nudging, so to speak, that there are people right around me that perhaps I should be giving more of my time to. I'm intimately related to some of those people - like my children and grandchildren and I just want to be available to them. I just keep thinking that I may not always be as healthy and energetic as I am now and I want to be free to do whatever my heart desires - in my own neck of the woods - while I can.

I will most definitely still be an active participant in the SIStv community. I have no intention of giving that up. But I will log on when I feel like I have the time, at my leisure. And if I feel like I want to stay off the computer for a whole week (not bloody likely) then I will. I can just pop in to the website for a few minutes instead of an hour if I want.

I have sooooo many scrapping projects I want to do. And a beautiful scrap room just full of supplies. I love being able to go in there when I want and then, when I've had my fill, I can get up and shut the door behind me and come back some other time. LOVE that!

I'm only one hour and forty minutes into my "new" life and already I'm feeling, well, not a "relief", but a sense of release. Release to be free again with no constraints on my time. Free to choose how to spend my day without that pull to the computer. So far - it feels good. (Even though right now I'm ON the computer! But now I'll even have more time to blog.)

I really do plan to continue my friendships that I've made on SIStv - and there's no reason that I can't do that without the little red star by my name. :)

In other news - we've got some new pets around here. Just what we needed. Oy. We have THREE hermit crabs. Chris and Eva picked them out at the pet store and then came home and prepared a glass tank for them. In the photo below, Eva is very proudly showing me her dirty little feet after finishing this project. I don't think the dirty feet had anything to do with the project in particular. She just happened to think it was a good time to show them off to me!


And speaking of pets, just look at these two. How cute are they? That Beatrix is such a wild woman. She is keeping Rocky on his toes! She has zero fear of him. She drives him crazy jumping all over him and just annoying the heck out of him (which he takes quite in stride). And then, when she's exhausted herself, she decides that he'd also make a good pillow. And, again, he doesn't mind at all. "Ho hum" is pretty much the constant look on his face. She's a riot to watch and perhaps has rejeuvenated his old bones a bit. He is 15 after all. I wonder how much all of this will change when she gets spayed next month. We'll see.

Finally, here's a photo of Chris's that he took when we went out in the kayaks last week. We finally had a lovely, sunny, not-too-chilly morning, so we (meaning he) packed them up and headed to Rose Valley Lake for a little paddle. It was so relaxing and peaceful. I'm looking forward to more of that.

So, tomorrow when Chris is done at work, we head north to Pine Creek. Blackwell, PA, specifically, where we'll rent out little green cabin again and sit on the front porch every morning with out coffee watching the ducks swim by in the creek and the fishermen come by and try to get some of those very smart fish out of there. Where we'll pack up our breakfast and bike up into the PA Grand Canyon and watch for Bald Eagles as we enjoy our little picnic. Where we'll whack around a badminton shuttlecock to work up a good sweat so we can jump in the fabulous swimming hole just 20 feet in front of our cabin. Where we'll enjoy ice cream at the Cedar Run General Store for lunch whenever we can and dinner al fresco every night unless we're dining at the Cedar Run Inn or the Manor Hotel. Where we'll play cards or read or sit by a fire. Where the phone won't disturb and the computer won't connect. Ahhhhhhhhhh yes. Tomorrow we go on vacation!
The Barlow family reunion will cut short our usual week up there. But the good news is that we won't have to pack up to attend - because it's right there in the same place. Sweet.
So, it's over and out and I'll be back when the month is almost half over! Sayonara....
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1 comment:

Michelle Gautreaux said...

good for you Jan! you are doing it for the best reason! luv ya and will hopefully see ya at the next SIS event.
enjoy the little and big ones!